Early Nineties Nightmares, Part 3: Zach Morris Meltdown

Time for another round of Early Nineties Nightmares, though there are a few exceptions in this collection. As always, the nightmares part of the title is more for humor's sake as I really like the majority of these songs. Let me know what you think.


Early Nineties Nightmares, Part 3: Zach Morris Meltdown


01 Bingoboys feat. Princessa - How To Dance (Extended Radio Version)
Anyone else remember this song being EVERYWHERE? The rap and everything is catchy enough, but my favorite part of it had to be the instructional record samples. Their album, of course, sucked, but what would you expect from some serious one-hit-wonders?



02 Tara Kemp - Hold You Tight
Everyone thought she was going to be the next big thing, and for some reason I HATED this song. In retrospect it's actually really good, and the follow-up, Piece Of My Heart, is pretty good too, as is the album, but you can't have much of a career if you're one-dimensional and no one is trying to update your image. Not necessarily fair, but honest.

03 Janet Jackson - Miss You Much (Mama Mix)
The first exception, this was released in 1989, but I heard this everywhere for the next few years so, in my opinion, it counts. This remix extends the hell out of the song and uses lots of studio outtakes of Janet having fun. Her moaning like a puppy is adorably weird. My woman HATES this remix but loves the song, whereas I both love the song and the remix, preferring this version over the album mix.

04 Boogie Down Productions - You Must Learn (Live From The Caucus Mountains Remix)
Exception two, also released in '89, but I heard this one for a long time afterwards and it's unforgettable so it's here.

05 Big Audio Dynamite II - Rush (New York City Club Version)
When Rush came out I complained that it was too skeletal sounding, although I liked it and the album, The Globe, is great. I think I heard this remix in So I Married An Axe Murderer which is the soundtrack I got this from, and this mix is great! All the positive elements of the original are intact while giving it a new groove with lots of bounce. Wicked track!

06 DNA feat. Suzanne Vega - Tom's Diner (12" A)
Ah, who can forget the diner? As the title suggests, this is the extended version of DNA's remix of Miss Vega's sublime vocal. I might eventually have to post the compilation this track inspired, Tom's Album, which features Nikki D's Daddy's Little Girl and a bizarre take on the original acapella by Bingo Hand Job, better known as R.E.M. with Billy Bragg.

07 3rd Bass - Gladiator (Easy Mo Bee Remix)
What the hell happened to Easy Mo Bee? What happened to Pete Nice after his recent legal wranglings? Why was the final original 3rd Bass song relegated to single-only status? Why wasn't there some kind of 3rd Bass comp released by Def Jam to cover their two albums and the breakup records? Damn, this is a great track, weird backwards loops and everything. 3rd Bass are sadly slept-on in the annals of history. They were so good I can forgive them for their hating on the Beasties like the ignorant children of Russell Simmons they were being. No diss on Russell "Rush", just saying.

08 Living Color - Love Rears Its Ugly Head
Damn, this is a great song! Not a dance or hip-hop song, something more like a funk metal groove, but so full of soul! Living Color were hit or miss, but this was a direct hit. Too bad on the greatest hits comp they only include the remix of this. The video for this was great too.



09 MC Luscious - Boom! I Got Your Boyfriend (Radio Mix)
I can't believe this even made it to radio, what with the MJ samples, but it made it, and there was even an x-rated version that goes exactly where you would expect it. I guess this would fit into the Miami Bass scene alongside 2 Live Crew and other groups from that era.

10 Kyper - Tic Tac Toe
Yeah, this one again. I LOVE this track! I tweeked the compression a bit to make it a bit louder without brickwalling the track, so hopefully everyone is happy with it. Again, a great example of a sample that would never get cleared nowadays without a HUGE amount of money being ponied up in advance. Still amazed this came out on a major label with that Yes sample intact.

11 Corina - Temptation (New School Freestyle)
12 Lisette Melendez - Together Forever (New School Freestyle)
I heard both of these on Open House Party a few times too many in the early nineties, and on some very special occasions they got beat-matched together, which added to the confusion as to where each track began and ended. Well, the reason for that confusion, I later found, was because Carlos "After Dark" Berrios couldn't help but use a variation of the beat for each track. I can't blame him because both tracks are great, though my preference rests with Corina's Temptation. Play that record and tell me you're not smitten! As for Together Forever, expect a similar reaction.

13 20 Fingers feat. Gilette - Short Dick Man (Club Mix)
I HATE THIS SONG! It's here because it's of the era and it's annoyingly catchy. It's also the only track here with truly explicit lyrics. I warned you.

14 K.M.C. Kru - The Devil Came Up To Michigan
Am I the only one that remembers this track? A hip-hop update of The Devil Went Down To Georgia, it features the devil and young DJ having a scratch showdown. Kinda ridiculous but also fun. I really wanted to include the Cleveland variation which was done for one of the local radio stations, but I can't remember which one or find the track so the Kru's original version will have to do.

15 Shabba Ranks feat. Maxi Priest - Housecall (12" Remix)
The remix of this got all the play back in the day, but the 12" version took it to a whole other level with the crazy synths. Credit goes to David Morales for the killer remix. As for Shabba, no diss but I'm so glad I didn't hear much more from him. He was more annoying than entertaining, at least to my ears. When In Living Color did the Mr. Ugly Man sketch that hit dead center! That reminds me, anyone ever seen the video for Trailer Load A Girls? I'd post it but I can't seem to find it anywhere. It's frickin' nuts!